Episode 19: Rose Holbrook's Story: Through addiction to recovery and a beautiful yoga business!

Rosemary full interview


Sun, Jun 19, 2022 . 1:53 AM

59:35

Owner: Lynne Thompson
SUMMARY KEYWORDS
yoga, yoga therapy, people, yoga teacher, astrology, relapsed, training, learn, ended, gym, life, story, drugs, long, vedic astrology, college, degree, trauma, yoga therapist, lived
SPEAKERS
Speaker 2 (77%),
Speaker 1 (22%)
1
Speaker 1
0:24
Hi, and welcome to the Storied Human. This is Lynne Thompson. I have a fun interview today with Rose Holbrook. She's owner of Yogi scopes in Asheville, North Carolina. And she is on a mission to share what she's learned with other people. She's very inspiring. She works with a lot of diverse clients, and I'm very excited to talk to her. So welcome, Rose.
0:46
Hi. Glad to be here. Thanks for having me.
1
Speaker 1
0:48
It's just so good to have you. So we met on another course which is a cool way to meet somebody. And we're trying to grow our, our email subscription list and learn how to do that. So you're doing that for your business. Tell me just a little bit about your business and how, how it began how you started it,
1:06
you want the long version or the short and whatever
1:08
you feel comfortable with. Okay.
2
Speaker 2
1:11
This now is called Yogi scopes. And that is a plan words because I like to be punny. The it's a play on words for like yoga horoscopes, because the crux of what I do is personalized yoga. And astrology is just like an interest of mine. It's actually a passion of mine. It's something I love. So I learned Vedic Astrology. And so one thing I kind of view and teach is Vedic Astrology. But for the purpose of teaching folks how to personalize their yoga practice, based on whatever you know astrological energies at play is one of the things but also our VEDA. So the seasons, the natural cycles of life. So using just everything yoga philosophy has to offer, I'm trying to learn myself, because I love it. I'm passionate about it and package it up in a way that folks can learn how to apply it to their life, because I think that, you know, Instagram and whatever has given us this idea that yoga is about like skinny white chicks and contortionist poses, but it's about so much more than that. And personalizing a yoga practice is about more than just an hour long. Vinyasa or, or whatever, like yoga practice you would do at a yoga studio, or a gym or whatever. There's like way more to it than that. And so that's kind of what I do. Now. It's yoga therapy. I'm in training to become a yoga therapist. So I can't call myself a yoga therapist just yet for legal reasons. But what I do is yoga therapy, therapeutic.
1
Speaker 1
2:56
That's fascinating. Yeah, I think I love it. Now, how did you find that like, most people don't know about Vedic Astrology. And you're connecting it to yoga, which is really cool.
2
Speaker 2
3:09
So that's actually another kind of like mission I have is to teach other folks that are into yoga or yoga teachers that want to incorporate their, like astrology into their teaching about Vedic Astrology. Because from what I've seen, even folks here in Asheville, if they do incorporate astrology is Western astrology. And that's frustrating to me, just because I don't know, I guess I'm pedantic or something. But I think I'm like, Yoga has a system of astrology. They're made from the same place like they pair way better together. And so I found that I just heard about it in my yoga teacher training that I did in 2017. But I so I just briefly heard about it, then I was always interested in astrology. I just didn't know that Western, or Vedic astrology was a thing. I studied Western astrology, like, my entire life, like I was into it. Even growing up and then I just heard about Vedic Astrology and my first yoga teacher training my 200 hour. And so then I was like, okay, that add that to the list of things I need to learn. And finally, I learned it over the course of since then, until now, really, in 2020 is kind of when I picked up and started doing it more professionally. Like I felt like I learned enough to do it more professionally. Yeah, so
1
Speaker 1
4:37
yeah, I love that impulse to put the Eastern with these eastern right to Eastern things instead of Eastern Western is radically different. The astrology is really
2
Speaker 2
4:49
it has a lot of stuff in common but so one of the big differences I like is that it feels less fatalistic. Just the culture of Vedic Astrology feels more like that. We're going to look holistically at your birth chart and what that means the implications of that as like you as a person and these are your karma if you will like your your the hand, you've been dealt in life, like the thing, the lessons you have to work through. And you can either learn your lesson and transform yourself in your life or you cannot and you can be stuck in whatever hand you've been dealt and you can be pissed about it, but I feel like Western Astrology is more like oh, well I'm a Gemini, so I'm such and such, you know, and it's kind of like I am this way. It's a more fatalistic mindset. In Vedic Astrology, like yoga has a more holistic culture.
1
Speaker 1
5:41
That is so interesting. I've been interested interested in astrology my whole life, but mostly like you said, Western I didn't even realize it was Western until recently. There's a wonderful podcast by someone I know called rooted in starlight and I have learned so much from her. Her first name is Trish. Morrissey is her last name, I've learned so much from her, because she sort of brings it down to earth for us. And, and kind of gives you tips about what to look out for and feelings you're going to have. So I think that's so useful. And I really love the idea that you're talking about where it's not. It's not cut and dry. It's not either or it's not like, I think that's so Western like you are this or that. It's like black and white. And I love that you're, you're attracted to this other thing. So how did you get into yoga? I love how it just became more and more of a thing for you. And now you've turned it into a thriving, really beautiful business. I love what you do. But how did you first figure that out that maybe I should do this.
2
Speaker 2
6:44
So I'm gonna go way back because it's an important part of the story. I think it started like I started doing yoga in a gym when I was like, 15, like, my mom would drive me to the gym. It was like my hobby after school. I was a gym rat, like I would just hang out at the gym, I think so this is like addiction as part of my story. And I look back on it. And I'm like, before I was addicted to drugs, I was totally addicted to the gym. Like I would spend two three hours earlier if I was in high school, and I was a swimmer. So when I had swim practice, I would do that. But when it wasn't swim season, because I was never like a year round swim or anything. I would just spend all this time in the gym. And so finally one day I tried to a yoga class just at this local gym. And so I sense this sometimes in yoga studio communities, they kind of like look down on gym yoga, but I think personally I'm like gym yoga is fine yoga. It's great. Like there yes, there are some teachers there have gyms that like are just getting their start, or whatever. But anyway, gym yoga, like it's how I got started when I was 15. And I practice yoga throughout the rest of high school. Because I just immediately fell in love. I had this teacher, that not with the teacher, but with the practice. I had this teacher that she was like, super strong, but she was also like really nimble. And just like, I thought she was awesome that I wanted to be like her. And so I did a lot more yoga and then I ended up going to college. And I still practiced yoga like you know, just at the Rec Center when I was in college, but during college I found myself actually like so my high school sweetheart boyfriend I started dating in like junior year of high school or whatever. And I was still dating him up until college I promise there's a point to this story. He ended up he was in the military. And he like hurt his foot or something and military. So he went up on painkillers and he went down this like, horrible rare like I'm I'm of the opiate epidemic, Jim generation, like I'm a millennial, almost everybody I know from high school is like, has some story related to like, opiates, you know, like, yes, the people in my peer group are very much the ones impacted by the opioid epidemic, you know, and so, I fell into that as well, because this guy was dating. Like I was in college, we were in a long distance relationship because he still lived in my hometown. And I ended up going away to college. And so for the year, I lived far away, I was pretty good. And I was doing yoga and I was I was in college and but my family has this. You know, they're they're a bunch of like doctors and lawyers and accountants and whatever, like, you know, my brother's an engineer. My mom's a lawyer, my granddad's a doctor, like, you know, super like, we go to college in this family, we get real degrees, like, professional Yeah. And that was the culture I was raised in. So I was like, I'm gonna go and get a real degree. Like, if I could have done what I wanted to at 18 years old, I would have pursued probably like exercise science. because they had that, you know where I started out for undergrad. But that didn't seem like a real enough degree, I didn't really understand Exercise Science at the time. Now I'm like, that totally would have been a good option. I could have been a PT or something. And my family would have been happy with that. But no, I decided through this freshman seminar class project thing, where they were like, figure out your dream job or whatever. And so somehow I landed on engineering. Because I was really good. I mean, I took calculus in high school, I took physics in high school, like, I was really good, I still am really good at math and science. Like I didn't fail out of engineering school, even through my addiction. I was like on drugs and working in an engineering school and still getting straight A's because I'm nerdy like that. But I saw I landed on engineering. And because I thought the school I was at, like, I was looking at the options of majors they had, and they had one listed as pre engineering. I didn't know that that meant you were supposed to spend like, two years there and then transfer schools. But then I found that out, and I had already decided, so I was like, Alright, I'm transferring. And it turns out the school I transferred to was closer to my hometown. So then I was closer to the drug use in this codependent relationship I was in and because I was like, super codependent. Instead of breaking up with this person, because he was down a bad path. I thought I could like fix him, you know, whenever I could
1
Speaker 1
11:35
help there. A lot of us think that right? Yeah.
2
Speaker 2
11:38
And instead, I ended up just going down that same path, too. And I ended up addicted to opiates. I was like using them intravenously, you know, like, like, I was a junkie, you know, and I understand like, I've now since gotten a degree in Health and Wellness Promotion. And there's this whole culture in the health world. It's like, person first language, like, we don't use words like junkie, but I was a junkie. I can say that because I was one. You know, and so
1
Speaker 1
12:06
I hear you. Yeah, like how old? How old? Are you at this point?
2
Speaker 2
12:10
I at that point. So I'm 28 now, but this was all going on. And I was like, 1920
1
Speaker 1
12:15
That's so young to have to battle that. Yeah.
2
Speaker 2
12:18
And I was in engineering school at the time. And I was like, it sounds wild. But I was like, I worked. I was a lifeguard because, you know, I was like, always a swimmer. Okay, so around it. Second year of college, I moved, I transferred because I learned in that, you know, honors class or whatever, I took the freshman seminar thing it was I could have stayed at the school. I started that for two years, but I was like, you know, I'm kind of a dive in headfirst kind of person. Anyway, I was like, let me go ahead. And I was eligible to transfer after one because I had just started with, you know, chemistry and physics because I figured I would want to go into something sciency because I'm good at science or whatever. So I had already taken the prerequisites, luckily, and I could transfer after one. So I'm like 19 years old, moving back to kind of my hometown, like the middle part of North Carolina. I did live in the city and my hometown was like a small town outside. So I was like, 19, I moved back closer to home closer to this boyfriend I was super codependent on and he had by this point, pretty much wrecked his whole life on drugs. He had gotten kicked out of the Marine Corps, lost a bunch of jobs gotten kicked out of school, like he was not doing well. And my gosh, because I was super codependent. I didn't you know, I thought I could fix him, right. Like I was trying to help. I was like, you know, thinking if I could inspire him because I was going into engineering school, and I was doing good stuff with my life. And really what happened? That is like, he was kind of just dragging me down. And so I was working really hard. Like, I worked and I was in school, and I ended up just like, once I tried it, because so like, like I mentioned earlier in the story that like, I noticed, like I'm not blaming him for the fact that I ended up on drugs, like I I had tendencies of addiction before that, like I can look back and see I was kind of like addicted to exercise addicted to the gym, but it wasn't a bad thing. Like it was
1
Speaker 1
14:26
good for me. And you can see that now looking back.
2
Speaker 2
14:29
Like I just have an addictive personality. I have addictive tendencies and which by the way, there's a lot of indicators of that in my astrology chart, which is why I love astrology and super validating. Anyway, so and I had, like, dabbled in drugs in high school, but I was like an honor roll student so like, I didn't think it was fine, but that's why I was desensitized to the drugs and I ended up eventually trying them and you It was, you know, the rest is history. Like I got addicted to IV opiates and went down that road was definitely a part of the opioid epidemic epidemic. I like overdose, you know, like all these things woke me up quickly, like I woke up in an ambulance once I try not to focus too much on like the trauma. Yeah, my story because, um, you know, I'll get into this in a little bit because, like I ended up just skip ahead. I ended up like finding my way back to yoga. And that's how I got off of drugs eventually, like, I mean, I went down that path. And but what I've learned is that you don't have to tell the battle stories over and over again. Yes. Yes. traumatizing. Yes. Like
1
Speaker 1
15:48
reliving and re traumatizing. Yeah, that. That makes sense. Yeah.
2
Speaker 2
15:52
Yeah. And so I learned that later in the future, but that's very much the culture of like, AAA and NA, they're like, You have to tell it to like, heal it or whatever. And that's actually like, really bad advice. But it's more nuanced than that. Because sometimes you do have to sort through things. But yeah, just like telling in a public setting is just, it doesn't actually serve a whole lot of good. But I do, like, tell some of it just to illustrate, like, I was all the way out there. Like I, I recognize that also. I mean, like, I'm a white girl that comes from a family of privilege. Like my family has a bunch of doctors and lawyers and, and stuff. But that's one of the things I experienced, like I went to a two year long inpatient rehab, I ended up at one of those in 2015. So this was a couple years later, I spent about three years being like really strung out, but I was also in engineering school that whole time.
1
Speaker 1
16:50
Wow. Yeah, you're what we call a functional addict. And they was and there are people like, like, in my family, I have the same thing. My father was an alcoholic, and he was functional the whole time.
2
Speaker 2
17:03
I might catch Flack, if I have a my family, like listens to this, but I'm saying anyway, there are some functional alcoholics in my family, for sure.
1
Speaker 1
17:12
Some of them don't have a clue. i It's sort of like, among a certain age group. It was just how you were raised and how you socialized. And I don't think people even name it. You know, I hear you. I love how you make a difference between, you know, we do have to give our problems words, we have to say it out loud to make it real, but we don't have to go over and over and over it. I think that's such a great point.
2
Speaker 2
17:34
Yeah, just all the trauma, there's no, I mean, that's, that's a large part of the work I do now. So I'm sure we'll get more into that as we go and like more about what that means. But yeah, so I ended up in rehab, like I went to jail ended up in rehab. And it wasn't until I found my way, I found myself in a worse abusive ship after that one. An even worse one, I found myself in as it's a progressive disease, right. Like they say that and it's like, it just keeps getting worse. And did for me, I found myself like living in my car. And but I had a car, you know what I mean? So it's like, anyway, yeah. So I recognize like, I when I was in that rehab, there was some element among some of the other folks in there that were like, you're this like privileged little white girl you don't really like belong here. And I was like, sticking needles in my arm. I think I kind of do.
1
Speaker 1
18:34
Very good point. Doesn't matter, right? The problem is the same. Yeah, yeah,
2
Speaker 2
18:39
totally. And so that was like, thing I had to work through and I bounced so I went to that rehab. And then afterwards I moved back home and I was clean I've been clean for over a year I tried to go back to engineering school that was a dumb idea. You know, they say the definition of insanity is like repeating the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. So that was my third time after spending a year in rehab of dropping out trying to get clean and then going back after I got clean and it was on that time that after being clean for a year so a little over a year and I relapsed and within like a week I was you know already I hadn't lost my house or anything because it had been I only relapsed for about like I was only using again for about three weeks. So I didn't it wasn't long enough to like Miss rent or like what I say you know, I didn't like lose my place to live or or my job or any of that that time but I did end up with like a nasty infection and ended up in the hospital. So it was like yeah, so it got bad again really fast. And that's kind of how it works. And so during that time, I also caught a charge so that charge MIT made me have to go to like drug court which me meant I had to go to an outpatient rehab, which that was, the magic was not necessarily the outpatient, although it was like I had a really good counselor there. So I like to emphasize that part of that, like, finding a good counselor is not easy. But if you do find a good one, it can be really beneficial. But it wasn't just the counseling. I also because it was outpatient. And I decided finally that I that was my last hurrah with engineering school, I was like, let's not do that again. Clearly, clearly, like I'm not in it, I wasn't in a relationship, like, there was nothing else pointing to my relapse, except engineering school, you know, so I was like, that's part of the problem. So I'm not going to do that anymore. So meanwhile, I'm dropping out of engineering for school for good. I'm working as a waitress. And in outpatient rehab, which is like three hours a day, three times a week, or something to get my charge dropped. Because it was my first drug related charge, like, anyway. So I'm doing that. And because I was working, and not going to school anymore. And like before, I'd been used to like, you know, I worked in wind engineering school. So I've always been the kind of person who like, does a lot of stuff. So working part time at a restaurant, I went ahead and got a gym membership at the Y. And on my way back to working out a lot and doing yoga again at the Y in Raleigh, North Carolina, because that's where I lived at the time. And, yeah, and I figured out like so it became apparent when I finished the outpatient program, and I was doing really well. Going to the gym and doing yoga, and like I worked at a restaurant. So I worked nights. So I would like just go to the gym and just spend a couple hours at the gym in the morning. And like, you know, kind of like I did before I ever ended up on drugs. And it became apparent that yoga was a big piece of that. No longer relaxing, and that I yoga was kind of like my first love, like I fell in love with it before I went to engineering school. And I was like, Well, that was a big old flop. So I need something to do with my time. Instead, I'm going to just while I'm figuring it out, I'm going to do this goal that I had a long time ago of pursuing a yoga teacher training, which is what I wanted to do when I was like 17. But I didn't because that doesn't count as a real career. But it does. Now I have made a career out of it. And I've proved love
1
Speaker 1
22:36
that. Yeah, if you found yoga again, it's so healing, it healed you.
2
Speaker 2
22:42
Yeah, and I hear that from a lot of folks, like a lot of people that do yoga, then not even if they weren't ever like on drugs or like whatever, no good just heals it does like, and that's the sentiment I hear from a lot of people and I even then, and I so being my nerdy self, I was like, I'm gonna get to the bottom of this, I want to know why. You know, so. So I kind of like. So just to like, give more details of the story I was. This was early 2017. Now, so it was spent a year in rehab from summer of 2015 to like spring, early summer of 2016. Went back to engineering school, fall of 2016 Relapse during midterms that October, not clean again, in early November when I wound up in the hospital. And nobody was like I was in the hospital by myself that was really miserable. So I was like, this sucks, don't want to do this anymore. Then I also my coordinate was coming up. And so over that, too, like February is when I was in the outpatient of 2017. And I also still started dating, then my now husband who I have two children with. And we were kind of like an anomaly because we knew each other from doing drugs. I mean, we were both from the same small town. So he was like friends with my brother. And stuff. Like I didn't He's much older than me. He's seven years older than me. So like I didn't know him. During school. I knew him afterwards when we were both on drugs and running in the same drug circles. So that's an anomaly. That doesn't usually happen that people that are freshly clean like that start dating, and and stay clean. But here we are, you know, six years later, married with a family and both very much clean. You know what I mean? So
1
Speaker 1
24:37
you're our team. Yeah, you're able to support each other. Sometimes that works. Yeah, I wanted to just say one small thing about the relapse because I think people have the wrong idea about relapsing. It's totally normal. It's part of the process. It doesn't mean you failed. I see it all the time. And to a smaller degree when I tried to quit smoking. It took me about six tries. And I told you People that and they're like, really? And I'm just like, yeah, because I got better each time doing it. Like I figured it out each time I got a little better. And I don't see it as a failure at all because I've lived that smaller example. And I love that, you know, we have to get that word out. People don't get it. Like, yeah, you know, again, there's that either or Western thinking, right? It's like, oh, they relapsed. It's all over. They failed. Oh, no.
2
Speaker 2
25:26
Well, and that's part of this is why like, I hate to poopoo on anonymous, because it comes across that way when I say like, the anonymous programs, because I did start out there like going to meetings, because that was like what you're supposed to do. And stuff. And but just the culture, the shame culture of picking up a white ship is like, really bad. Really like, yeah, that just, yeah, you don't lose the progress. You made the healing progress you made? Because just because yes. Like I was saying, like, I relapsed for a few weeks after being clean for a year. And I got just as bad as I was instantaneously like, rather than it taking a few years, like it did before when I first started. But when I got clean again, it's not like all that healing progress I had made was last.
1
Speaker 1
26:13
Exactly. So I wanted to make sure we say, Yeah, point for sure. Journey is really about well, it's very similar if you're starting a business, right? Like I was taught, as a young person in my family, we were told, like, Don't ever go on your own business, you know, Uncle so and so did and he lost his shirt. And, you know, that whole idea that if you fail a little bit, or you fail once it's all over. And that's just read that's that stinking thinking to borrow a phrase from? Yeah, you know, and I've really had to, like retool my thinking about it all, because we're on a journey. And the failures are stepping stones, you know, we and we, we step on them, and we learn and we keep going. Yeah, so your story is really powerful that you, you know that you got it and that and also that you ended up like your husband really understands it. If you're with somebody who gets it, you can really help each other. So that's cool.
27:06
Yeah. Well, and I think a
27:08
lot of that's a lot of living, by the way for somebody
2
Speaker 2
27:10
who's 20. Yeah, so that's what I like, I get that a lot that I'm like, like, I look young, I am young, you know, and it's like, what can I know about? But I just was on the fast track to like, know, a lot. Yeah, yeah, a lot. So I went through a lot of hard stuff. And it was kind of miserable while I was in it. But I think also just say like, what you mentioned about your brother in the family story about losing the business, like our stories are so important. That's why I love what you're doing here with this podcast, because you know, we have our story. But then we also have our way that we conceptualize that and the way we think about that, and that can either be empowering or it can not. And you can always change the story. Like you can't change the past story, but you can write a new story, right?
1
Speaker 1
27:55
I love that. Yes. And we have our stories that we've internalized maybe from our family, that don't serve us anymore. And that's a big part of why I do this. So that we can look at those and go, you know, that doesn't really work for me anymore. Me that somebody else said that about me or somebody else told me that, like the whole money thing to like, I'm learning about mindset and money. And I was told, you know, money doesn't grow on trees, like this is really negative kind of, you know, scarcity mindset. And not that that's so terrible. It's people were my family words, they were trying to protect me, they were doing the best they knew at the time. But now we know differently. And it's really powerful to let go of some of those things and take a look like some people are unconscious about what they've been told about themselves. They have those voices in their head, they think their thoughts. Those are their thoughts, you know, and the story is, I call it family myths. There's so many myths that we tell about our families.
2
Speaker 2
28:52
Well, like, like I was saying, with my family, the story I was told was you're gonna go to college, I was told that from when I was like five years old, you're gonna go, we get real degrees. And I ended up finishing my degree because I was, you know, I was three years through, I only had 30 credit hours left, like one year left when I dropped out of engineering school. So I was like, well, I need to get a degree, I should not let that go away. So I did end up getting a degree but like, my husband, like I was mentioning, he did I think like one semester of college and that wasn't for him. And so he went into a trade and he makes more money than I do.
1
Speaker 1
29:28
Trade and probably loves it right? Yeah.
2
Speaker 2
29:31
And yeah, so he actually because he is an entrepreneur, like I don't know. So, like, I was always kind of an entrepreneur too. I started my first business when I was like 16 You know, anyway, that's another story for another day. But um, so he kind of empowered me to start my own business as well. And that's what so I'm like for our children. I'm like, very conscious that I'm not going to start them. The what we have in North Carolina, the NC five to nine like a college savings plan, I don't know if that's outside of the state of North Carolina, we have to do that. Because I don't want like, I'll start them a savings account, but not one that can only be used on college because my husband and I decided for our kids that we don't care what they do, as long as they're good people in life, you know what I mean? Like, yes, you've been very successful at a trade. And he was also he's very smart. But he was kind of told, because he was a rowdy kid, that he would never make it in college. And he better go into construction. You know what I mean? So it's like the story. Yes.
1
Speaker 1
30:33
Yeah. Those stories. Yeah. And, you know, putting you in a slot, right? When you're very young, like, how would they know? Right?
2
Speaker 2
30:40
Yeah. And so it's important the stories we tell our self the stories, we tell our children, you know, the stories that come from our family, like, Oh, that's very important. And, yeah. Yeah, so we're, that's a choice, kind of conscientious that we're not going to tell our children how to live their life. Yeah. As long as they're good people, you know, like, well raise them they get, they're gonna
1
Speaker 1
31:05
get so much out of your example, too. Right? Totally. You model like, I found I became a better person for my children. You know, I just was trying really hard to do the right thing and be the right person for them. I ended up becoming a better person. And I liked it. I liked that transformation. And I, I'm in there, 23 and 26. Now and they say, well, we always knew we were loved. Right? And they're pretty, you know, you'll love that when you get to that point, because you're gonna realize they got it, like, they appreciate it. And you get compliments. And it's like, okay, it was worth it. And all those years of worrying about what they were eating and where they were going. And what I was saying. And, you know, it's not easy. I know, it's not easy, but you're starting out. Great. I think you're starting out great. So okay, so that's amazing to me. So you moved into this new venture, but I'm amazed to that you finish. You said, I'm going to finish that degree. So you have an engineering degree. No, I
32:03
don't. I gotta do I got a degree in health? Because
32:07
you change the major.
2
Speaker 2
32:09
Yeah. So I ended up pursuing my yoga teacher training, I worked, I moved back in with my mom so that I was no longer paying to rent a place with other college students in Raleigh. I just moved back in with my mom. And that was kind of like hard at 22 or whatever. But I did, and, and my mom's great, but so I moved back in with her and I worked out the restaurant, and I went to the gym, and I saved up my money. And I paid for a yoga teacher training. And when I was deciding where I wanted to do my yoga teacher training, it was like three grand. And so when I was able to like student loans and stuff that was like, no small feat to save up that three grand I mean, I was like, like, I was living with my mom. So I didn't have rent. But I like to recognize that part of the story that like, I had some things that were easier because I do come from a privileged family, right, but like, still, I did it. And so I decided to do my yoga teacher training in Asheville, North Carolina, because I grew up my whole life in North Carolina, in the middle part of the state. And I've lived all over North Carolina, through all my escapades in my early 20s But I landed in Asheville because my then boyfriend now husband had moved here as well. Also kind of on his own journey of getting clean and finding healing and whatever but so I was I was a little bit chasing him like the the yoga program I landed in is a was a fantastic one is a fantastic one Asheville yoga center. I think it's better than any of the programs I at least could find at the time in Raleigh. So like, like I say, I moved here for yoga training, but really, it was because I was chasing him as well. But that worked out so. So I landed here, I did my first yoga training. And in that yoga training, it was a year long, it was like kind of like a school year, but yoga trainings are on the weekends. So it was like one weekend a month from September to April over 2017 to 18. So So I did that. And I was working cleaning houses at the time, I ended up starting my own business cleaning houses and cleaning vacation rentals. So that's another just like random business I've run. And we were super broke back then. But I did it and I I did we had to do this research project, for about yoga for trauma for my yoga teacher training for the 200 hour training. We had to do any research project and I like on any area of yoga that kind of lit us up. Right and so I chose I chose you yoga for addiction. But meanwhile, I had also found out about why 12 Sr, by Nikki Myers, the yoga of 12 step recovery. And I did that training. And that was cool and I taught that for a little while but I'm also just like that But I don't do that anymore. Because I am so critical of the 12 step culture in general. So I just don't.
1
Speaker 1
35:06
I mean, it's helped people, but it's an older paradigm.
2
Speaker 2
35:10
Yeah, I'm not about it. So, and they kind of require that that you like, also, they strongly suggest that you still have a sponsor and, and work the 12 steps yourself if you're going to teach that. So I was like, man, and I had a lot anyway, I had a lot of trouble finding anywhere in Asheville, surprisingly, that would allow me to use the space to teach that. So it didn't. For long, I taught a few. But I didn't do that for long. But anyway, I so I, through that program, though, and I'm still in the same lineage as Nicky Meyers in terms of yoga, like the current poly lineage and the Vini, yoga lineage for people that are deep in the yoga rabbit hole and know what that means. One in that lineage, but very therapeutic lineage. So I ended up discovering that the root of addiction is really trauma. And the root of, in my opinion, my slightly educated opinion, at this point, the root of a lot of mental health struggles is trauma. And so I've kind of made it my career since then, to study and learn, like therapeutic yoga for trauma, because that was on my path to like, heal myself, you know, from the trauma I went through, during my addiction during those abusive relationships. And then also like, whatever one's led, whatever trauma led to that addiction, I had to figure that out and work through it. And like I said, I did have like a good counselor when I lived in Raleigh, but then when I moved to Asheville, I didn't anymore, that's just an aside, but I continued practicing yoga, studying yoga for trauma. And I ended up I was like, I really need to like finish this degree, I shouldn't just let all that go to waste. And so I did, I just looked around. And at UNC Asheville, they had a program called Health and Wellness Promotion. And I was like, that sounds good. You know, I was like, sounds like it would go well with yoga. And I didn't know at the time when I signed up for it, just how good it would be. Because UNC Asheville is a liberal liberal arts school. So I also like had to go back and take some liberal arts classes and study like, ancient history and stuff, which was really rich and I enjoyed doing that. But then I also just I took anatomy and physiology and stuff that I still use, like, people in my in person classes are like, wow, I can tell you really know your stuff about the body. And I'm like, Yeah, cuz I've studied the crap out of it. Sorry. I like say bad words
1
Speaker 1
37:45
a lot. No, that's fine. No, I love that. So it all worked together. Yeah. added to your the depth of your knowledge.
2
Speaker 2
37:52
So I ended up Yeah, it was very holistic. I studied, like, not just like Nutrition and Exercise Science, kinesiology, anatomy and physiology, all these things that are very important to know, as a yoga teacher that yoga trainings just don't get there like, yeah, yeah, like a lot of yoga trainings, don't cover that stuff. And it's really important. And so I ended up getting my degree in that. And I also not only did I learn that stuff, but I learned a technique called motivational interviewing. So I was a wellness coach there on campus, and I learned about how to kind of help people arrive at solutions for their own life, without me telling them what I think they should do, like helping. That's what motivational interviewing is about, like helping people find the answer within themselves. So that's kind of in and I also did undergraduate research on yoga for trauma. And so that's kind of been ever since I've been studying yoga for trauma, I've been pairing the eastern and the western. And then astrology was just an aside along the way, but when I found my way into studying yoga for trauma, I was like, Well, I'm gonna have to become a yoga therapist. And so I'm doing that training. Now. That's why I said, I can't like I'm not a yoga therapist, yet. It is a minimum of four year long program can take up to eight depending and like I've missed a couple of the trainings for like, childbirth and life stuff. So taking my time through it, just like it took me eight years to get a degree. It might take me a long time to get this yoga therapy training, but I'm in the portion now where I do practicum so I'm able to see pay, like patients clients for yoga therapy, but I just I do yoga therapy, I do personalized yoga based on therapeutic techniques. But also based on astrology just because I enjoy it. I enjoy astrology and there's a lot of richness to the birth chart as well. And yeah,
1
Speaker 1
39:57
you know what I hear and all of this and I love it. I hear someone who follows her heart. You know, like with each step, you're like, Well, I'm really interested in this and you just kept going and you had such stick to itiveness because you did what you loved. And now it's all coming together. Now a lot of us don't know what a yoga therapist is. So could you talk to us a little more about that?
2
Speaker 2
40:19
Yeah. So it's a hefty hefty training, like most. So like I mentioned, my first yoga training was over the course of a year, and that's even drawn out like they have ones that you can do within three weeks, and they're just super like, slapped, here's a certificate, you're out there. And it's like more of a calisthenics type. You know, that's why people are critical of gym yoga, because there's a lot of underqualified folks. But anyway, I have opinions about that. And this is the venue for that. But so
1
Speaker 1
40:51
say, just as a very beginning yoga person, I've taken yoga classes here and there. And already, I noticed a huge difference based on the teacher. Just huge difference, like you just get this whole other level. Yeah, the teachers good. So I hear you.
2
Speaker 2
41:06
Yeah. And so I try to encourage people because I teach the why now, because it's important to me, because the why yoga, in some ways saved my life, you know. So I still there. And so I have some folks come through my classes that are like, brand new to yoga, and I'm like, Hey, if you didn't like my class, I encourage you. Or if you didn't like my class, I still encourage you to try multiple other styles and teachers, because nobody can be the teacher for everybody. And I've just over the years through more practice and training I've learned to like, like, I'm just being myself, like you said, like, I'm just being, being myself. And yeah, I've become very well trained and not taking things personally. So if people don't like my classes, I'm like, Okay, I'm not the teacher for you.
1
Speaker 1
41:56
I'm not your person. Yeah. And
2
Speaker 2
41:59
that's fine. And I hope they continue and try out other teachers, because there are teachers that are very different than me, like, I have a podcast, I say cuss words on like, I'm not an airy fairy, like a lot of yoga teachers are like, very theories, and they're so sweet. And, and nice. And, and I'm not, I'm like very brash, like, you know, I'm, I don't know, I'm a goofball. Like, I'll make jokes in class. And I just, some people appreciate that. And some people don't, but I'm like, I'm not for those people. Anyway, yoga,
1
Speaker 1
42:30
good to just be yourself and let people decide. Yeah, that's excellent. You're just offering who
2
Speaker 2
42:35
you are. Right? Yeah. And I can't be anybody else. So anyway, yoga therapy, to become a yoga teacher is 200 hours of training. And that's different than like, you know, college credit hours, like the average you take like, like over a full four year degree, it's like 120 credit hours or something 120 and 130. So it's very different. It's like, credit hours are, I don't like you take 15 a semester, but for a 200 hour training, that's like the whole 200 hour hours, you know what I mean? Like, I've seen 200 hour trainings, offered it as like, two semester, like, basically eight credit hours of college, eight to 12 credit hours. So the hours are different is what I'm trying to get up. But okay, that's like the whole, like, the amount of hours you spend in the training is 200. So just to put it in perspective, for people that aren't familiar, a yoga therapy training 800 hours on top of the 200. So you have to have a 200. So by the time you become a yoga therapist, you have a minimum of 1000 hours of training, most of the time more, because so I'm almost finished with my 500 hour certificate for yoga training, and then I'll have the 800. So you know, that's like 1300 plus all the extra little stuff I've done on the side. So it's a lot of training, like, yoga therapy is a lot of training. It's way more in depth. It's basically you learn lots of yoga practices. And like I kind of alluded to earlier that, that it's more than just the asana practice more than just the hour long practice you do in a gym or a studio, although I think there's a place for that. Like, there are some people that are like, No, that's not good, because yoga is more than that. And I'm like, yeah, no, but 15 year old me would not have been down with anything more than that, or like fresh off drugs knee. Like, that's what I needed. And that's what a lot of people need is that, that gym class or whatever,
1
Speaker 1
44:39
like, I like that you recognize that it's an entry point for some people, right?
2
Speaker 2
44:43
And some people never go further than that. And that's fine because it probably still impacts their life in a positive way. And some people, the ones that want to go further than that will, you know, and so we learn all the other sort of limbs of the practice like the breathing practices, the chanting the mudras, which are like the hand positions. All this stuff we learned all late and very much very deep into the philosophy, the ancient Indian Hindu philosophy, Vedic philosophy, from where all of this stuff comes. So we're very deep in that very steeped in you know, Indian philosophy Vedic sciences i or VEDA like I mentioned, the training, like none of them, as far as I've seen incorporate Vedic Astrology, but that's just a personal passion project of mine. So I wouldn't did a separate training for that now, because so that was born. Because I was always so interested in astrology, I used to theme my group classes around, it started out with just the new and full moons. And then I just kind of went down the astrology rabbit hole from there, purely for the point of having something new to teach about every week in my yoga classes. And so that's on the list for me to like, start teaching other yoga teachers how I do that how to theme based on astrology. But then, also, like right now, the focus is largely on doing astrology readings and yoga therapy for people, which I was this was all a tangent to say, What even is yoga therapy? Yeah, so typically, so we're very steeped in yoga philosophy. But we're also very steeped in like in these 800 hour trainings, we also learn more in depth anatomy, which I will say also my call, I was blessed with a very good college professor of anatomy, so I like really, really learned it at UNC Asheville. But I just think the approach of most yoga teachers to teaching anatomy is like, and they might understand it, but understanding something and teaching it well are not the same thing, right? So I encourage you on like, if you really want to understand anatomy, just go take a college class, like go to a community college or something and take a college class, about anatomy anyway. So they do include that in the training. So it's, it's kind of a blend, like I was saying of the East, and we have to learn the anatomy, we have to learn all the different ailments people could present with the different, you know, physicians and traditional allopathic health care practitioners, we have to learn, you know, how to communicate with them effectively to be a part of an integrative health team. And then also, we're deeply steeped in the yoga practices to bring this holistic element. And so how yoga therapy works. You know, once somebody has all that training, and they're ready to start offering yoga therapy, it's typically in six to eight session packages, usually. And the first session is an intake session where we go over a very thorough health background, that's not only like, like what you would fill out at the doctor and includes that kind of information, but will also ask about, you know, your spiritual practices, your emotional components, like it's very holistic, I like to say yoga therapy is meant to help. You know, sometimes doctors can't see the forest through the trees, like all the doctors are very well versed in their very own tree, but are like that story where it's all like the blind people. And they're like, all standing around with a piece of elephant. Yeah, it's like that. And the yoga therapy is to help you see the elephant when you've got all of that. Yeah, I mean, you. This is a tail. No, this is an ear. No, this is a trunk like, what are you? And you've got all these doctors running you around, doing, you know, there's value in that and what they do and what they're good at. But sometimes we need somebody to help us piece it all together,
1
Speaker 1
48:37
and help us love that idea of combining. Yeah, and yeah. And that team. So it's
2
Speaker 2
48:42
very in depth training, because we have to understand a little about a lot. You know what I mean? We have to understand and yeah, not a lot of different things, to help people piece it all together. And I just went I started on that training a few years ago, couple I started in 2020, early, January 2020 is when I started. And I shouldn't be finished by end of 2024, early 2025. But so I'm in it right now I'm deep in it. But when I started that training, I was like love and theming my practices this whole time based on astrology, I hope to one day offer like astrology, just add that as a component if people want it and their yoga therapy. So that's in the works. Right now I offer astrology readings, to anyone like you can do that virtually. And I'm working on building because I have just recently reached the practicum portion of my yoga therapy training meaning I'm eligible to start taking yoga therapy clients under the guidance of my teachers. I'm in the works of building out what that can look like.
1
Speaker 1
49:50
So there's so much depth to you, like what you know, the layers of learning and I just think people I'm so glad you're telling this because I don't think people understand when they, you know, you're not just a yoga teacher, you're so much more. Yeah, there's a whole lot to it. And the training, I had no idea, all those all those hours.
2
Speaker 2
50:13
I think everybody has this much depth. I do, I think it's just not everybody is as much of an open book because I am I just like, I went through a lot of like, really hard stuff and embarrassing stuff. And I just, I no longer can be embarrassed, like, I'm not, you know what I mean? Like I've lost.
1
Speaker 1
50:30
But that's the gift of having those hardships, the gift of it is you have a depth and a compassion for others. You know, there's gotta be some upside, right? And there is there is, but I mean, also just basically, as a yoga teacher, you have so much depth, like literally your training, I had no idea there was so many hours involved. And I didn't know anything about yoga therapy. So I just think it's cool that you're getting it out there. Like there's a lot more that people can learn and train and
2
Speaker 2
51:02
totally go through that. Because I'm like, I'm basically in what's like grad school for yoga teachers. Exactly. That sort of reminds me of like, because I have some peers, you know, people in my peer group that went to college and did that like, thing, like my brother, one of my brother's a year older than me, so we're like friends, too. And he's in grad school. And so it's just like, I have people around me in grad school. And they're, there's some element of like, well, why aren't you in grad school, you have a degree, you should go to grad school, and I'm like, are not alike. So part of me was like, oh, I should get a physical therapy degree, or I should get a master's in social work. And I'm like, maybe one day because I'm clearly a lifelong learner. And I didn't, and I'll keep learning forever. And I don't care how long it takes, you know, like, I'm just gonna keep studying and whatever. But right now, I'm just focusing on the yoga therapy, because I'm like, it's kind of kind of a nice combination of both. And maybe one day, I'll decide if I want to go the physical therapy route or the actual, like, therapy therapy route. But right now, what I'm doing,
1
Speaker 1
52:03
that's great. I think it's so good. I think you found your place. And I do love that you're a lifelong learner, because we all benefit from that. You know, whoever comes in contact with you. benefits from the fact that you're always learning.
2
Speaker 2
52:16
Well, that's a good there's a negative wisdom in that too, for folks is like, just like you said earlier, just because I was good at engineering. Yeah, because I'm super nerdy. But I kind of nerdiness is something that lights me up a little bit more, basically. Yeah,
1
Speaker 1
52:32
I think that's such a good message. No matter what people are doing, if it doesn't light them up. Yeah, they've got to find maybe, and you know, I don't I'm not one of those big, like, you need to drop your career and find something else. Maybe you will. But can you find a vocation? Can you find a side thing? Can you find something that lights you up? Because it's not, you know, this whole idea of the past? I don't know if it's if it's trendy anymore, but I was always told, like, find your passion, you know, and, and I, I never had a single passion. I'm a writer, I'm a generalist. I mean, I'm interested in lots of stuff, ya know, and I felt like a failure, like, oh, I don't have a passion, you know, I mean, I have some things I'm passionate about. But I think that again, that's, that's Western either or, you know, you're either in your passion or you're not. And that's silly to me, and I don't think your job has to be the end all be all, like, I really liked my job. Is it my passion? Not really, but I really like it. It brings a lot of fulfillment, and it supports my family. And, you know, I used to say, my passion is my paycheck, getting a paycheck. Yeah, I have a passion for that.
2
Speaker 2
53:44
Well, there's a lot of stability in that. And I agree that like not everybody needs to be entrepreneurs. It's not for everybody, it it can be really stressful. And some people it's like, maybe they do it as a side hustle. But there's a lot of stability that comes in having a regular job. And I like to recognize also, this is something I've noticed recently that like, the whole online courses thing is like the new pyramid scheme, like, I'm just something I've noticed. And I'm like, not everybody needs to quit their job and become a digital course creator or whatever. But they're totally hear you. Yeah, this notion that if you're passionate about something, you should like pursue it as your income and for some people, that takes the passion out of it for them.
1
Speaker 1
54:26
And people need a certain personality. Yeah, and grit to be an entrepreneur. I've always been attracted to it. I love talking to entrepreneurs. But I don't know if I would have made it through, you know, like, well, now I do this on top of my full time job, and I'm really happy with the combo. Everybody's again, I'm always saying this and it's so trite, but it's so true. Everyone has to find their own way. Yes, nobody. It's like N equals one. Nobody is I can't tell you what to do. And I used to tell people what to do. It doesn't work so great, you know, or just because I take a supplement that works for me, it doesn't mean it'll work for you. Right? So remember that each person has their own path. And their own time. Timing is, is really everything to, you know, like, I noticed my life, my trajectory was so different from others because I had kids so late. It just changes everything, you know. And my career was like, upfront, you know. And now I'm older, and I'm enjoying this. So everybody will find their own. Right, totally.
2
Speaker 2
55:29
And there's people like me who had children, I was 25 and 28, when my kids were born, and I'm over here, like, envious of my friends who don't have kids, and they're, like, killing it in their career. And I'm like, I wish but but really, like I am, it's just harder for me. It's just a little different. Yeah, yeah, to find my own way. But that just to tie it all back into that's like, why I love astrology is because there's no like, you know, I got a degree in health and wellness, like, part of what I do is wellness coaching, I could have gotten a certification as a wellness coach, I just didn't, because I have all this yoga certification. I was like, that's a waste of money for me. I'm down the yoga thing. But so like, I've done all this training, about wellness coaching, and a lot of in the wellness coaching world, they tell you to like, specialize and pick a pick an ideal client and help one set of people with one issue. And I'm like, No, that's yoga therapy. And astrology is holistic in that I don't need to be good at one thing, I'm good at helping people look at their birth chart there, whatever elements they have going on in their life, through the yoga therapy through the astrology to see what they're there, you know, to use yoga words, their karma is their dharma. Yeah, and they've been dealt and their life path, you know, and help sort that out. Because I had to sort that out too, you know, and that's where the passion came from me like, finding my own dharma.
1
Speaker 1
57:02
That's so cool. Each person's unique. And that's what excites you, you're not a, you know, I'm gonna specialize in this one narrow thing I want to find out about each person
2
Speaker 2
57:11
who's unique. Yeah, nobody wants to be put in a box either. But that's actually, you know, with astrology, it's like, it helps us compartmentalize in such a way that like, feels it's almost like meditation, you know, like you, you've put your thoughts that you make your thoughts separate from you. Yeah. And so that you're able to be a witness to them rather than,
1
Speaker 1
57:35
right, that's very powerful. You have to go soon, right? Oh, yeah, ish. Okay. Well, I'm feeling like, you know, in a little while down the road, there's a part two here. Okay. Because you've got a lot of good stuff to share with us. I just want to thank you. Just for you know, being authentic and sharing so much of your journey. You never know who it's going to help. I really appreciate your time, because it really, it's very powerful when people hear what someone else did with their, with their, you know, with everything with their ups, their downs. And here you are. I'm amazed at all that you do. I wish I lived closer so I could go to your yoga class at the Y. Yeah. And I wish you all the luck. Sounds great to me. Yeah, your combination of thing. Yeah, it's really good. Thanks for reaching out. And, yeah. Thank you so much for joining us today on the story of human and thanks again to Rose Holbrook for sharing so much of her story in herself today. You can get in touch with rose at Yogi scopes.com. And she has a free birth chart decoder that you can sign up for. And you can also do your chart remotely with her. You don't have to be in Nashville to do it. So definitely check that out. And thanks again for listening to the story of human
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